The Ultimate Men's Gift Guide (2024)
Back and better than ever
I asked men, actual living men, what they really wanted for Christmas this year. And - just like last year - they answered1.
Reflected here are the opinions and desires of screenwriters, published authors, award-winning journalists, fishermen, fishers-of-men, philosophers, scientists, readers, mountaineers, outdoorsmen, filmmakers, Tao Lin, DC stooges, NYC fuckboys, Hollywood agents, socialists, Republicans, failed DNC operatives, PhDs, college dropouts, engineers, sweethearts, saints, policy wonks, Twitter villains, three men named Max, epicures, raconteurs, and general ne’er-do-wells. Pick your poison, we have every kind of man represented here as long as he knows how to kill an animal or speak to me sweetly. Sometimes both! And if you see some socks down there, don’t fret. I’ve loosened up my ‘no utilitarian gifts’ rule since it seems some men do take pleasure in receiving useful gifts.
With no more preamble I present to you the ultimate Men’s Gift Guide, with up-to-the-minute desires from the most subtle and sophisticated men in my circle of acquaintance.
Men of Letters
Literary men are far from disappearing. And they have demands.
Many recommended pens. Says lawyer Sadev (32): “A beautiful fountain or ballpoint is a nice gift for the lawyerly type - they won’t buy it for themselves, it’s an heirloom item, not nearly as expensive as a watch, and something that’s tactile and can feel really personal if you nail their taste.”
Editor Lewis (29) recommends Wordsworth and Black
Max (25), representing the DC branch of my Global Axis of Maxes2 (GAoM), recommends Quill and Ink Calligraphy Set by the J. Peterman Company, which seems to be out of stock at the moment
Renaissance man Paul (ageless) advises you to choose wisely: “Folks have different tastes in pens. I like a sleek pen (as opposed to clunky), vintage is cool but those are tricky (various ways of replenishing ink.)”
Bauhaus Edition Notebooks, recommended by DC Max (and also by me)
Lewis recommends Mubi GO for men who live in any of the pilot cities (apparently, it’s just expanded to DC)
Sohrab (editor, 39) recommends Criterion Blu-Rays
Many men requested rare, signed, or first edition books, from 70s editions of Dune, to a limited edition of Carl Jung’s The Red Book. GAoM member LA Max (Hollywood agent, 27) recommends rare editions of “dude” authors (Stephen King, Phillip Roth, Bret Easton Ellis, Don DeLillo, Cormac McCarthy, Robert Caro, Paul Aster, etc. etc.).
DC operative Lars (26) recommends the New Directions book club
I asked beloved Berlin-based writer and critic Ryan Ruby (40) to recommend three books to give as gifts for the edification of the men in my audience. He recommended one book of poetry, one book of nonfiction, and one of fiction:
The Book of Ephraim (poetry)
A Time to Keep Silence (nonfiction)
Life: A User’s Manual (fiction)
Ryan’s own book Context Collapse (out now from Seven Stories Press) also makes a wonderful gift
- recommends Gloria Naylor’s book 1996
Editor Damir (47) recommends a leatherbound Bible, noting this imperial blue goatskin edition as a singular (and stylish) choice: here
Tech lad roon (27) recommends giving the gift of sustained mental illness with a 12-month Twitter premium subscription.
Journalist John (36, has a new book coming out in March!) recommends gift cards to indie bookstores: “Gift cards for bookstores are the best gift because you get the experience of going to the bookstore with unlimited possibilities.”
As always, I recommend magazine subscriptions… DC writer Ryan (39) says: “For me, the obvious – but truthful – answer is always books. And as we’re all in need of more pathbreaking fiction than ever, I recommend Sublunary Editions, NYRB, New Directions, Seven Stories Press, Verso Books, Center for the Art of Translation.” See also:
And merch from any of the above publications
The New Left Review of Books (“for a certain type,” says Lewis)
Le Monde (says Lars: “A good magazine. French. Only 5 dollars a month.”)
Copies of Issues 1, 2, and 3, published by our very own GoAM member LA Max!
Men of Action
Men who can’t do, teach. Men who can’t teach, tweet.
The Great Outdoors, and so on
- (lapsed prepper, 49) recommends a Gransfors Bruks small forest axe, “for classic Euro vibes” or alternatively their wildlife hatchet which has won design awards. Both come hand-forged with the individual maker’s mark on them.
A really cool knife
Give the gift of deceptively simple Japanese fly fishing. Journalist James (37) recommends Tenkara Rods for beginners
Zach (sociologist, 36) recommends alpine rope for the climber in your life: “Less than 9mm diameter to account for weight, dry treated obviously, some say you need 70m for multi-pitches, but that’s bullshit. You certainly need at least 30% elongation or that shit really hurts on a whipper.” You can take his word for it.
Zach also recommends two memoirs of early years of serious alpine mountain ascents in the 40s/50s: Conquistadors of the Useless and The Mountains of My Life
James recommends A Natural History of North American Trees
Nick recommends a Sid Mashburn Hard Edge Marble Lighter in Tortoise
I recommend a CIA or NSA lighter, which you can find on Ebay
Aer Travel Pack 3 and Travel Kit 2
The noblest actions are those made for the sake of little creatures in need. DC Ryan says: “I always like to donate needed items to local animal shelters each holiday season. Donating on behalf of someone in your life is a fantastic gift idea. Humane Rescue Alliance in DC has a Sponsor an Animal package where $250 provides spay/neutering, vaccinations, food, toys, and bedding for an animal in need. Similarly, Montgomery County MD animal shelter (where I adopted my own dog) has a donate a bed option.”
Fitness
Justin (professor, 42) recommends a grip strength trainer. “Obviously the correct range of grippers to get will vary by person. For most healthy men, 50 is probably too low for anything but rehab. Anything over 200 is probably too much unless they are experienced lifters or do heavy labor, or some other variable that doesn’t apply to me, I guess.”
Alvaro recommends an Equinox membership, mentioning that “Solidcore gets men JACKED but it’s Pilates so they don’t think to get their own membership. Could be a fun adventure.”
Alvaro also recommends Athletic Greens (“SOOO good for you”)
Writer Matthew Davis (27) recommends nootropics depot MicroZinc in addition to his novel Let Me Try Again
An Oura ring, just make sure he wears it on the wrong finger (or right one, depending on how well you know him)
Bryan Johnson didn’t get back to me in time, but we’ll get him in next year’s editionUPDATE 12/9: Bryan Johnson came through in top form with a very thoughtful recommendation for men, which you can listen to here:
Men of Style
The men I know, know how to dress. Here is what they recommend.
Fragrances
Fragrances were a touchy subject. LA Max recommends a good cologne but caveats it must come “from a woman who wants to sleep with me or has slept with me. This cannot be a platonic gift.” Says West Village sensualist Marcos (31) “I would name-drop a perfume, but things like that should be gate-kept.” No matter. Other men were happy to provide specifics:
Sadev recommends Ink Rewritten by Nigel Slater
I recommend Lonestar Memories by Tauer
I also recommend French Lover by Frederic Malle
Lars recommends Me Paraissait Une Ombre by Etat Libre de Orange
Writer Shadi (41) recommends an oud scent from Oudimentary
Jack Schlossberg (local writer, 31) comments on the power of natural musk:
I don’t have any ideas other than the gift of liberation from showering regularly — men don’t need to shower so often!!
Clothing and Accessories
Sweaters, sweaters, sweaters. Multiple men mentioned a desire for cashmere sweaters, from J. Crew crewnecks (new OR vintage on Ebay) to Land’s End black turtlenecks to forest green sweaters for brunettes. Nick (lawyer, 34) recommends the classic sweater in navy cashmere from Sid Mashburn.
You have no idea how many times “black turtleneck sweater” came up in my inquiries Watches were also a popular pick for many men.
Jack (DC DJ, 27) recommends vintage 1920 Waltham watches (can find on eBay)
Blake the Man (New York-based musician, 28) recommends a Chinese military watch (the Seagull) made with the same design from the same factory since the 1960’s
I’ve given this Orient Bambino dress watch before. It looks so sexy paired with a classic Oxford shirt (and a couple buttons undone)
Jewelry. The most stylish man I know (Osita, writer, 31) concurs. “Get your man jewelry! Make him accessorize! Watches, signet rings, pendants and necklaces, tie bars, collar pins, collar chains, novelty buttons, stick pins, pendants…” Says internet sensation and light-of-my-life Alvaro Chavez (25): “Men look good in rings (makes them look like emperors), but I bet sometimes are too embarrassed to buy their own.” If you’d like to ice out your man, I recommend starting him off with a simple gold or silver ring from Mejuri and going from there.
T-shirts from Merz b Schwannen, recommended by NY-based researcher Alexei (32)
Alex Mill garment dyed work jacket
Every guy I know is getting Self Edge selvedge denim
James (New York it-boy, 24) recommends black hi-shine tassel loafers from Solovair
DJ Jack also recommends this puffer jacket from Big Rock Candy Mountaineering (or anything on this website)
Consider giving a novelty hat or many novelty hats Streetwear. Former restaurateur-turned-cog-in-the-corporate-machine Sam (28) says “Fugazi is popping off rn, they’re like the new Supreme for adult men instead of teenage skaters.”
New York Max suggests hair coloring chalk for kids: “Everybody’s into queer baiting these days anyway, so why not at least help your man have fun with it? While you’re wearing your Brat shirt to Nowadays or Zebulon (or wherever tf people in LA go to dance and kiss someone with a septum piercing), he can match with neon green highlights in his locks. Or if you’re actually a freak, give him shock blonde hair for a night and pretend you’re [redacted] an actual DJ.”
Bob (on-the-road-a-lot reporter, 39) says a winter hat and scarf are always nice to receive
Philosopher Sam recommends gloves, but only from Rhanders Handsker in Copenhagen
Lars recommends a nice vest: “If outdoorsy I recommend Cotopaxi (a bit thicker than Patagonia). Can never go wrong with a Barbour vest, but that’s more a spring/fall sort of thing.”
Osita recommends ties: “I dont wanna hear that these are dad gifts. I don’t wanna hear that these are outdated. Ties are *in* again. Simple patterns are going to be the most versatile. I would avoid solid colors unless they’re very textured. Solid knits are nice, for instance. Nothing slick or shiny looking.”
Men of the Castle
A man’s home is his castle, and the world his to conquer.
At Home
Nick recommends a Lisa Corti reversible quilt (see this one in Tibetan Tiger Celeste Blue)
Nick also recommends a Teig Lamp by Schoolhouse
New York Max recommends high quality fake plants: “Even having gone to liberal arts college, I still don’t know more than maybe three men who can seem to keep a plant alive. Save their apartment from feeling like an undergrad New School Bauhaus project of concrete, empty nothingness by giving them a palm or a succulent that in their dimly lit enclave passes as real and, in the daytime, at least gives the illusion of life in their life.”
Reporter-turned-finance guy Matt (50) recommends Vitsoe modular shelves: “An investment that every man (and woman) should make. And not just any modular shelves — I’m looking at you Elfa — you should invest in good, modern shelves. You should invest in Vitsoe. Sure, your kids may not go to college. But you will have amazing shelves that will elevate your home and your life.”
Christian (research scientist, 29) recommends a Miele Canister vacuum cleaner, the C1 or better.
Justin recommends a sleeping mask: “This is good for a gift from a woman for a certain kind of man, at least, because it is not masculine-coded and so many men would never buy it for themselves. And yet, it is useful.” Can confirm, I gave an ex a Brooklinen sleeping mask to much praise.
Lewis says a skincare set from The Ordinary would be nice, “since women seem to have innate knowledge of such esoteric matters.” True.
The gift of art: “One of the best gifts I’ve been given personally,” says friend Connor (26), “was assorted random paintings and prints for a wall collage.” Osita recommends giving old prints, globes, or old maps of the city they live in.
At Large
Tickets to concerts, the opera, symphony, theater, or other cultural experiences. LA Max suggests the upcoming Glengarry Glen Ross Broadway performance, or Enemy of the People with Jeremy Strong. I recommend a package of tickets to the symphony, or a membership to a local art museum.
Osita recommends a local bathhouse. “A friend of mine strongly insisted I try the Russian and Turkish baths in NYC for many months and I’m glad I finally did. An old-world spa experience you might find in places where there’s a large Russian or Eastern European diaspora. Get him a pass or gift certificate.”
Three dads of young children wrote to express a desire for more childcare. If you have any dads in your life, consider giving the gift of babysitting.
Dinner reservations at restaurants. One of the Maxes says: “I wouldn’t normally think to make reservations for the places you have to book a month in advance.” Frankly, I think this is a Max problem, but if this also applies to your man, don’t let me stop you.
Cool sports swag (Bob recommends anything having to do with the Masters)
Mikey Madison’s phone number
Men of Taste
Food and fine drink
DC Max recommends these hand-made oyster knives from Brew Shucker
I will continue to recommend actual oysters. You already know I love Hama Hamas.
James recommends a portable gas grill
Alexei recommends the “#1 kitchen implement”: the Kunz spoon
Christian says “Look at his cutlery and replace anything that isn’t stainless with stainless.”
Single origin chocolate bars from Dandelion
Glass tupperware
Kitchen standards: Osita recommends a wooden cutting board, a Dutch oven, a wok, a carbon steel pan, a chef’s knife, kitchen tweezers, a carving fork and/or basic cookbooks.
Alternatively… a little charcoal, some red meat and a lot of Tecate can go a very long way. A whole duck! Says Osita “I don’t think there’s a better consumable gift. Good for multiple meals if portioned out, or a feast of a group dinner. And the fat can be rendered out for many, many things.”
For coffee lovers, Christian recommends going to the Lance Hendrick or James Hoffman YouTube channels, picking a category, and getting the latest thing that has a good review (examples: gooseneck kettles, espresso scales, hand-grinders, burr sets, portafilters)
A bag of Mexican candy
NYC Max recommends a wine fridge. “It’s no secret that the ~New York wine boy~ in your life is for sure the most difficult to shop for. Picking a bottle for dinner? Try picking a gift for Christmas. The thing is, he probably definitely doesn’t have a wine fridge in his life and is chilling those ever fashionable “chillable reds” in his shitty fridge in Bushwick [ed. note: Mount Pleasant or Brookland for DC readers]. Give him the control he so obviously tries to exert at every restaurant and let him store his Chablis at an appropriate, exact, 58 degrees.”
DC Max recommends this wine subscription
“Whisky but only Ardberg,” says philosopher Sam, “because the whole world should smell like peat.”
Sam also recommends Audry Exception cognac. I do love a man who knows how to pander.
My dad (scientist, 70) recommends “a little-known bottle of the best Mazatlan mezcal (with medicinal qualities) named Pata Salada, paired with a pair of hand-thrown shot glasses.”
Men of the Machine
Gadgets, and also objects.
Forrest (software engineer, 37) recommends an “object to end all gifts this year,” that’s right, the violent turbo fan: “The Chinese copied a fancy Dyson motor and now you can get their powerful fans in $20 handheld devices on Ali Express. Everyone’s getting these from me this year. A warning to ladies: it will suck your hair in.” Find here.
Christian recommends a nice camera strap, in particular a Peak Design Leash or Slide
Flipper Zero, or similar hacking multitool
Saltypickles (30) recommends Sony WH10000XM5 noise cancelling headphones
Of course a Tungsten cube
DC Max recommends the “best mouse in the world”
New York Sam says “For the Bushwick [ed. note for DC readers: Mount Pleasant or Brookland] man in need of a hobby that’s not going to dive bars: A Pioneer DDJ-400. Great affordable entry-level DJ controller that still gives you the features you’ll need to know how to use if you’re ever DJing a real venue with a professional setup. Easy to get secondhand.”
Paul the renaissance man suggests giving coins: “Gold or silver coin depending on budget. I would get one that is loose and not in too nice of condition so they can feel comfortable holding it. Many coin shops have interesting foreign coins or oddball tokens in sliver, some in gold.”
Paul also recommends a nice pipe. “Even if guys don’t smoke (actually especially if they don’t smoke) they all like owning a pipe. I’d go for something interesting like a meerschaum that catches your eye, or a calabash.”
On the Principles of Gift-Giving
Editor Damir on what to give the special man in your life:
I’ve always loved it when a woman buys me some item of clothing or a fashion accessory.
Ideally it shouldn’t be something I like, but more something I didn’t know I needed. I perhaps speak only for myself, but I’m not terribly fashion aware: I pick a general male template and then buy clothes according to it. I rely on a woman to either nudge me out of my fashion comfort zone, or take what I have and put it on another level with a tasteful accent.
It’s a sentimental gift, because you think of the woman whenever you wear it. And it communicates a subtle claim by the woman — a signal to other ladies that this one is spoken for — which to me is endearing and sweet.
And ladies: if you’re dating a man who has such strong opinions about fashion that you’re hesitating buying him anything, consider ending the relationship. Any man with such strong opinions on fashion is likely to be gay.
Zach the sociologist continues on the same subject:
In all seriousness (…) women should give men a dopey card about how much they love and appreciate them, mentioning some specific acts of service. We are big softies too.
Philosopher Oliver (37) on what to give the man who has everything:
One thing I think is underrated in gifting is doing it “against type.” Personally, I tend to think I have all the me-type stuff taken care of, but when someone gets a gift that add something to my life that they understand or would think of and I don’t or wouldn’t, it has a larger effect.
DC Ryan (a true romantic) on giving books as gifts:
Gift someone your own favorite book. Regardless of gender or relationship dynamic, I think William T. Vollmann’s sentiment [ed. note: Ryan hosts a wonderful podcast on the works of William T. Vollman], as written in his novel Europe Central, applies: “[…] most pleasurable of all is lending [a book of perfect beauty] to the person one loves: Now she is reading or has just read the scene with the mirrors; she who is so lovely is drinking in that loveliness I've drunk.”
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In every major city I have traversed in the continental US, I have magically discovered my very own personal Dionysian shaman, a patron saint of his respective city, bold and generous, blessed both with the gift of gab and the gift of knowing how to order for the table. Miraculously, he is always named Max. So formed Audrey’s famed Axis of Maxes.
great guide, but Damir's line: "And ladies: if you’re dating a man who has such strong opinions about fashion that you’re hesitating buying him anything, consider ending the relationship. Any man with such strong opinions on fashion is likely to be gay." is an insane perspective to endorse.
You would be the ultimate gift to any man, queen.